After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Sorry my hands just texted you
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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