whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
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