i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
