Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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