I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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