Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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