so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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