I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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