please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
