dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
