Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
