Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
