i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
