That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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