i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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