i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
