I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
