I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
she smelled like a LAN party
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
