FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
