What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
