Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
