Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Randomize
