Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Randomize
