Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
