There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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