so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
