Hey man sorry I got all grabby
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Randomize
