Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
My vagina is officially offended.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
