I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
