Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
you had me at cake vodka
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
