So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
