Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
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