You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
