im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Randomize
