This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
