Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
