This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Randomize
