she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
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