He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Watching her eat just hurts me
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
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