So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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