just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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