We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
