Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
