He asked to "fluff my boner.."
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
