he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
