hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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