Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
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