i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
