best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
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