get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Boobs speak an international language.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
